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Advice My 30’s Self Would Give To My 20’s Self

January 29, 2016 2 comments

I often think about how awesome it would be if I were able to get advice from myself in the future. Future-me could tell present-day me that new job I  left my old, comfortable job for was a smart choice, or whether or not “planking” for pictures will stick around as a trend. (Do you guys remember planking? What hipster bullshit was that?)

In life, the only way to gain insight is to live through challenging situations that create character. But as an anxiety-prone person I just want to know:

Am I doing life right?

That being said, now that I’ve left my 20’s behind, survived them really, and I’ve reflected on some choices that if I had the ability I’d go back and advise about I would. Some serious, and some not.

I’d have a productive little chat with my sweet, dumb 20’s self:

1. Hey girl, just tell your friends you don’t like nightclubs

I cannot tell you how many mind-numbingly loud, smoky, dance floors you will be dragged across, but it will be a lot. There will be $20 vodka-crans, men with frosted tip hair and Ed Hardy clothing. My God the Ed Hardy. This isn’t your scene and you should just simply tell your friends that.

club

You’ll smile for pictures and dance but you’re faking it. You will witness a woman wearing an Ann Taylor pantsuit hump the face of her companion so hard she breaks his nose on stage at Opera Nightclub, and that will still not be the end of your night. Those girls you met while waiting in the bathroom line are not your new best friends. Go home, old soul.

2.Hey girl, if you have a good boss and job, appreciate how rare that is

There will be an opportunity for you to leave a good job, and a boss who had your best interest at heart, for one that is more exciting. You won’t fit the new company, and the company won’t fit you. You’ll be laid off and it will break your heart.

The injury of this time in your life will change you forever. You’ll doubt your abilities and you’ll flounder in self-hate, but you’ll recover. You will be ok. Know you are not alone in experiencing something like this as a young person, and remember you’re still valuable.

3. Hey girl, strangers should always be a little strange

If you meet someone and they instantly call you his or her best friend: that is a crazy person walk away. If you don’t, you’ll be at a dinner party where Crazy tells you they paid to have research done on you on the internet, and you’ll have to Irish goodbye the hell out of there.

82381-AW-HELL-NO-meme-Wonder-Woman-zaGp

4. Hey girl, be careful about the water in the Dominican Republic

This should go without saying ya idiot, but don’t brush your teeth with water from the sink. Things will happen to your digestive system, horrible things. It’ll eventually get so bad you’ll yell “Avenge me!” to your friends on the other side of the bathroom door. Bottled.Water.ONLY.

5. Hey girl, stop comparing yourself to others around you

You’re not on their path and their not on yours. Especially stop comparing your life to the “lives” you’re seeing on social media. That shit isn’t real. What’s real is you Comet scrubbing your bathtub while you listen to embarrassing music choices on your secret Cranberries Pandora station you hope no one knows about. That’s real and no one posts stuff like it, because everyone is curating a life online.

6. Hey girl, put aside money just for Bridesmaid dresses/duties/bachelorette penis straws

At this time in your life you’ll be a part of several weddings. It will be fun, and it will be costly. On average a bridesmaid today spends approximately $1,500-1,800 dollars per wedding*. That’s a lot of bones. In 2013, you will be in 7 different nuptials.

Learn to be more firm and say no sometimes. Yes, you will love the weddings and it’s the bride’s day, but she won’t have to live in a box because she’s broke after the wedding you will. Also no, you will never wear the dresses again.

7. Hey girl, write often, write more

Persue this because of the simple fact that it’s your favorite thing to do. See where it goes. Write even if it’s hypothetical advice to yourself.

8. Hey girl, don’t worry about being single

Dating in your 20’s is a tumultuous, boiling pit of trying to force things to work. Trust your gut, and don’t let being single or what label you think people affix to you because of that status means. If someone truly judges you because of it, they’re a dick. When you’re on a date and someone gives you a “No” feeling, you’re right. Do you own thing, and in time the right fella that it just works with will come along and you can’t control when that will happen. Stay open and positive. Be selfish about yourself because you can.

do-no-harm

9. Hey girl, try out meditation sooner

This is a tool you’ll scoff at, but it’ll help you to observe your thoughts and emotions and not be hijacked by them. Sitting on the sidelines of what’s going on in your head will put you at peace, and it’s not something you should put off. Maybe grab a kombucha after you’re done, ya hippy.

10. Hey girl, you’re ok

You’re doing fine, and you’re making mistakes. Your 20’s are a huge juxtaposition of major successes and failures. It’s a time of fun, pain, peace and chaos. Use it as a time to figure out what you’re about, and stop beating yourself up. Eat all the French fries your metabolism is so fast right now, and try to stop worrying so much you’re doing life right.

** Facts from USNews.com

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