Home > Uncategorized, WTF > Tell Tail Signs of the Apocalpyse

Tell Tail Signs of the Apocalpyse

So there is a lot of hub-bub over this year being 2012, and the predictions of the End of the World. Most notably, the Ancient Mayan calendar explicitly dictates that the end of the world will come on December 21, 2012. The calendar moves in a mathematically linear format that coincide with the movement of the stars; ticking the ages by until it reaches this year.

Apocalypse fanatics now have a calendar to clench onto to tout their crazy, and this year is ripe for more weirdos to come out of the woodwork.  Remember that dude Harry Camping, the self- taught internet and radio preacher, who predicted that the world would end on May 21, 2011? Yes, there will be more of those.  Which really is just comedy writing itself.

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Sorry about that Har-bear, but at least you got to experience seeing The Avengers. Right?

I will say I am a complete skeptic on this whole issue.  I don’t think that the annihilation of the entire human race will come in one Michael Bay-esqe explosion.  I thoroughly am enjoying scoffing at people holding signs on the side walk screaming “Repent.”

 

 

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Look at this dillhole, probably ruining peoples’ days on their quiet way to Starbucks.

 I do, however, realize everything has a beginning and  an end, I just think it will be more organic and gradual than the fantastical musings of crazy people on the internet.

I am sure.

Or I was until I saw this.  I stumbled across this company and its goods recently, and its been haunting me ever since.

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What.The.Fuck.

The company Kigu creates tails for people to wear casually under “Smart sports jackets” out in everyday waking life. (You can check out the rest of their stuff at  www.kigu.co.uk but I will judge you for it) Now when I first encountered this I was mortified that it may be an American company, but no this organization is English, so this one is on you, United Kingdom.  Wearing tails is not a new thing. Children (at Halloween) and the Japanese rock them daily  (no disrespect but I do not understand their culture) . Surely,  however it must be a sign of the end of ages when this kind of couture is commonplace??!?

Here is the description for the “Fox Tail.”

The Fox Tail by TellTails is luxuriously bushy and soft to the touch. Ideal for distinguished gents and ladies alike, it really does look smashing under a smart jacket. Having said that, stick it on with a pair of jeans and a T-shirt and you’ll look pretty dapper too! It attaches to the body with a comfortable, elasticated waistband.

 It’s the end of the God damned world people.

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Admittedly this one is kind of fun, and I hate myself for writing that.

So I leave you all to absorb this realization.  I’ve got to work on a bucket list, and see if I can somehow manage to seduce my childhood crush Devon Sawa between now and December 21st.  Lunch sounds good too, I have got to stand up from my desk and office chair, my dinosaur tail is chaffing like crazy.

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  1. July 25, 2012 at 5:47 pm

    This is friggin hilarious! I checked out their website. I know what my husband’s getting for his birthday now, lol!

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