Home > Uncategorized > Craigslist. Helpful online tool or simply a source of endless entertainment?

Craigslist. Helpful online tool or simply a source of endless entertainment?

 

So I have been looking for a roommate and I thought to myself, maybe I will check out Craigslist.  Boy am I glad I did.  I have never been a big Craigslist guy but I think that is going to change.  Reading the postings of all the people who are either looking for roommates or looking for a place to stay is extremely entertaining.  Let me put it this way, when I clicked on the “seeking roommate” section one of the first postings that came up said “Gay Friendly Cross Dressers”.  Now that wasn’t exactly what I was looking for in a roommate but that doesn’t mean I didn’t click on the link to learn more.  I was a little disappointed when the posting was only 2 sentences long but the second sentence was great.  It said, “I am a crossdresser and I am starting to change to a Tiffany”.  Huh?  Please tell me more.  Alas, there was nothing left to read so I moved on.

Now you can learn a lot about people’s experiences by what they say they aren’t looking for in a roommate/living situation.  What that really means is that they have probably experienced something like that before and they don’t want to go through it again.  Kinda like that warning label on Draino that says, “Do not Drink”.  Translation= Some idiot a long time ago decided it would be a good idea to drink a liquid used to clean out your pipes so we actually have to tell you not to do that.

Below I will list some various postings I read and then will attempt to translate their real meaning:

-“BLK straight bruh only interested in the same”.  Translation= No white guys, no gay guys, definitely no gay white guys.

– “With the exception of babysitting, I am willing to do ANY job for a place to stay”.  Translation= Yes that includes sex.

-“Male looking to find housing with female. Will share in all houshold duties. I need a place to store my toys. Will split rent. “  Translation= I am a serial killer.

-“My wife is home alone most of the time so we prefer a single female roommate”.  Translation= She gets lonely and will hit on you constantly.  There are video cameras all over the place so I won’t miss out on any of the action.

-“My fiance and I are looking for another couple to roommate with us in a house or townhouse.”  Translation= We are swingers.

-“Yes I posted $5.00 a day, just to get your attention .You can be any age, any color, any religion
There is a place in my house and heart and my bed for one deserving Woman. Yes You. The Girl that is feeling beaten down and not being treated right, the one that is hurting. You want to be here. I am close to the MARTA Train, and plenty of shopping.I have lived here for over 5 years. This is a nice secret place to find yourself. This is a real add, no scam.
You can be of any age, any nationality, any religion, any color, hair or bald. have money or broke,

hungery, car or no car. I’ll come get you.”  Translation= No one responded to my other post.  I am that same serial killer.

-“need somewhere to stay asap. not a roommate. not a roommate. please dont send me an email. if thats the case. i dont want to stay with anybody i dont know.”

Translation= I don’t like to masturbate in front of strangers.

-“I have a steady boyfriend.  I have one pet guinea pig and would like to have a space for a large cage for him. I keep his cage very clean. He can be a little loud when he gets excited”

Translation= My boyfriend makes weird noises during sex so I just blame it on the guinea pig.

-“Hello, I’m a 20 year old massage therapist/photographer looking for a rental with at least 2 bedrooms and at least one very large bathroom. I need a place where I am allowed run my business out of my home. I am also looking to do a small renovation of the bathroom. I have $11,350 professional steam shower/ hydrotherapy tub for my business. I would need to have the original tub and showerhead removed. I would be more then happy to pay for the renovation and the restoration of the orginal tub and shower when my lease is up. ”

Translation= I am a porn director so don’t be surprised to come home one day and see a bunch of video cameras, lights, and a threesome.

 

As you can see.  There is a lot going on in the world of Craigslist.  By the way, I found this all on the first page.  There were several more pages.  If you have any good Craigslist stories or have seen some good postings please share them in the comments section.

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. Mark W.
    January 10, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    Awese, AWESOME psychological profiling on these Craigslist weirdos. Personally, I would think to add that the boyfriend of the girl with the guinea pig may get into some Richard Gere type action.

    On a personal note, I’ve used the good ol’ CL to find a lot of roommates in the past and (even though this was a few years ago) lucked out with some great guys who are still close friends. However, I did have one dude who responded from DC who claimed he was the Rastafarian prophet, Marcus Garvey, who wanted to come south for greener pastures. Probably to grow better ganja. He also forearmed me that he hoped I didn’t mind very loud music starting at 4am.

    So, the end all might be what you’ve already posted… Use your head and not your bank account when finding a roommate. And definitely don’t use AdultFriendFinder.

    • Mark W.
      January 10, 2012 at 6:05 pm

      Ps – first word of that comment: awesome.

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